March on. Do not tarry. To go forward is to move toward perfection. March on, and fear not the thorns, or the sharp stones on life's path. ~Kahil Gabran As a single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives. ~Henry David Thoreau
Nickolas, are you ever coming home?
I need to see you and hold you close.
Please come and walk with me.
I love you always and forever, Mom
The "New Year" has begun and my heart aches to see you every day. There have not been any happy new years since you left us Nick. Every day I ask myself why this had to happen and how I will keep living this way. How?
Heart Failure
Darkness shrouds my heart.
How does it manage to beat
Through so much sorrow?
© bigD 2012
1 comments:
I stumbled across this blog looking for a picture. Something beautiful... The top picture...the trees... was what came up and struck me... I could have just saved the picture and moved on but something pulled me to read your blog... I just wanted to say I am in tears reading this. Although you are a complete stranger to me I feel so sad for you and the suffering you continue to go through. As a parent of 2 beautiful, healthy children, you make me thankful, and remind me of how blessed i am that they have no serious medical issues. You have also helped to shine some light on a few things to do if i ever did have to experience any of this (god forbid). I don't think you should have to hide anything, especially not your pain. Just remember that other people...here on earth...still need you...and love you...and are grieving also in their own way....
I am certain your intentions are purely emotional regarding this blog and writing it...maybe and hopefully it helps you in some capacity to deal with things that seem impossible to handle...or say things you can't or won't say out loud....but you have touched my heart... and i hope one day you can get back to somewhat normal.... never forgetting what you have experienced, of course...just maybe... living for another moment in time when you can be happy again. A time when you don't torture yourself over what you could have done...and maybe just accept what has happened and make up your mind to be guilt free. We all make mistakes...if we didn't we wouldn't be human.. imho, these mistakes weren't your fault nor did you have much control over them... Hypothetically, Imagine, if you will, how your death would affect others... Hopefully not in the same way Nick's has affected you... Thank You for being...and for expressing yourself in this way... I intend no harm in responding to your post and i hope you do not take offense to anything i have said... I am positive Your pain and sadness will one day ease and until then I think you should know that you are a great writer... you express your emotions beautifully... and you deserve to have a normal life despite what tragic things have befallen you... i hope one day you see that and make that happen for yourself... Take Care of Yourself... Sincerely, Erryn
Post a Comment