Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop away from you like the leaves of Autumn.”
― John Muir, The Mountains of California
It is Christmas Eve...another year without you.
There is a deep longing to have you here.
It doesn't matter.
The pain is a constant.
The sorrow seeds my soul
Darkness seeps through my veins.
There is nothing I can do to bring you home.
There is nothing I can do to change what has happened.
My world is stark like the words on this page.
There is no color...none of the twinkling lights, the reds, the greens, the bright lights of joy and peace.
My light has burned out...there is a short circuit, a bad bulb...
A tangle of emotions that cannot be fixed.
Your death has shattered my world.
The fragments of my life are crushed by those rushing to and fro.
Christmas means nothing if you are not happy.
It is a horrible time that I try to survive.
I wish you could see the mountains too. I love you my sweet boy. I love you always and forever.
1 comment:
Diane,
Thinking of you this Christmas. Nick sees the mountain, he actually is on top of it. I hope you can find a little joy and are able to smile this Christmas Day.
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